6% success.....or is it 94% failure?

It's been 25 days and eHarmony has sent me 134 matches. Of those 134, 9 women closed the match before I had a chance to either go further or close it out myself. That leaves 125 matches . From that ungodly amount of "matches", I closed 117 of them, which means there wasn't the slightest bit of attraction or interest on my part. That's leaves 8 women that I continued communication with and have been corresponding with. That's a success rate of 6%! 6 friggin' percent? I've never been the type to pick-up women at bars but if I tried, if there was a room o f100 women, I'm damn sure I could do better than get 6 phone numbers.

And of the 8, there's only two I've ended up reaching open communication with. So after three weeks, $59 and 134 matches, I have two email addresses. Are you serious?

So to commemorate my eHarmony one-month membership s00n ending, I wanted to show how one of my latest "matches" really took the cake. Here's a snippet from Laura from Laguna Niguel's profile (click on the image for a larger, clearer view and please note the answers I boxed in red):

Really? Personally, I would have waited until maybe Date #4 to reveal that kinda information. Hell, gotta hand it to her though...honesty is one of my Must Haves. It's just too bad (cock! balls!) genital warts (mother fuck! bitch!) and Tourette's (piss! shit!) aren't.

And I didn't even mention how she doesn't remember what the last book she enjoyed was about. WHERE DO THEY FIND THESE PEOPLE?!

You Can't Handle The Truth!

As chronicled the other day, the infamous "The Moment of Truth" episode has made it's way to YouTube. If you can't bare to see Lauren destroy poor ol' Frank in front of millions of people, turn away now!

43 Things (but a bitch ain't one)

I think this is pretty cool:

43 Things

Who hasn't ever filled out the proverbial "Things To Do Before I Die" list? I know I made one out during high school, which was something like 99 or 100 things. I stashed away the list in a desk and came across it a few years later, sometime around the age of 22 or 23, where I crossed off a few things, added a few and took off some ridiculous items. I'm really not sure were that list is now, but thanks to the above website, I have my list back!

I think you can make your list more than 43 things, but in the spirit of the website, I narrowed my list down to that exact number. I tried to remember my list from a few years ago and I think I did a pretty good job getting all the still-relevant biggies on that list.

I know I've done a few items since I last looked at my "To Do" list that I didn't need to include on my 43 Things, such as:

* brew own beer
* attend a championship parade (Went to the 2001 Laker parade)
* attend a BCS Bowl game (Went to the 2005 Texas-Michigan Rose Bowl)
* see the Red Sox play in Fenway
* visit the Grand Canyon
* swim with dolphins in Hawaii
* learn how to juggle
* go to a World Series game (the great Game 6 in 2002)
* have a cannoli from a New York deli (incidently, pretend to buy pot in Washington Square Park was NOT on the list)
* visit the top of Empire State Building
* get on the air of a radio talk show (I've made it onto Leo the Movie Guy show, Kevin and Bean, Hacksaw Hamilton's show, Jim Rome's show -- wasn't racked -- and Larry Elder show.)
* sit on jury duty (here and here)
* get a tattoo (honestly never thought I'd do it)
* sit at the Caeser's Palace sports book

Check out the link below to see what my current 43 Things are:

http://www.43things.com/person/jlederer

Whatta think? I'm pretty proud of my list, especially the fact that many of my "things" aren't shared by many other people. I like being original...it's that list that makes me me!

Anyway, I strongly urge you to create your own list. If you do, please post the link in the comment section for us to see!

Hat tip goes to Amanda for bringing the 43 Things website to my attention!

Well, there isn't a literal connection, Dude...

I was all ready to post this yesterday but the trainwreck called "The Moment of Truth" bumped it to another day. Anywho, hope you enjoy:

When I was home over the weekend, I was in my parent's attic, looking through my stuff in storage per their request. I was figuring out what to toss, what to donate to Goodwill or keep in storage. I came across my large baseball card collection and looked through some boxes of random singles. I found what I believe is the jackpot of cards. Really, it could be the mecca of all Separated-At-Births.

Walter Sobchak

Reggie Cleveland

Am I wrong? Am I wrong? All right then...

Monday Night Raw

So I got home tonight after the gym and flipped on the boob tube...man, Monday programming is awful!

Because nothing was appealing, I decided to do some PGA Apprentice bookwork, but I left the TV on in the background. For whatever reason, it was left on Fox and around 8:30 or so, I looked up and saw the game show "The Moment of Truth" was on. For those of you not in the know, the premise is simple: it's "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire" while being strapped to a lie detector. The host (game show whore Mark L. Wahlberg) asks the contestent who's in the hot seat questions and if they answer correctly, they win an increasing amount of money. (Before the show airs, the contestants are asked something like 50 questions while attached to a polygraph and then the 21 questions are selected without the contestants knowledge how they scored and what questions will be asked on the air.)

Before we go on, here's the cast of characters (sorry about the photo quality...it's screenshots taken with a BlackBerry in a poorly-lit cave studio apartment):

Lauren, the contestant


Frank, the husband


Mark L. "Don't Call Me Marky Mark" Wahlberg, the host

I can only imagine the first few questions were somewhat tame but I caught the game on Question 9, which was "During your last job, did you ever steal money?" to which Lauren hesitated, looked at her disapproving parents*, and answered "Yes" which we found out was not a lie. So not only did she steal money one time in her past, but because she admitted it, she's gonna get more money!

*On the stage, in addition to Mark and Lauren, is a couch of Lauren's support, which is her sister, parents and Frank, and a woman I have no idea who she was. They are seated on a curved couch and in the middle in front of them is a massive button on a podium. At any point of the game, one of Lauren's support could press the button and the question she must answer is instantly passed over. The button can only be used once. More on that later...

Lauren correctly answered Questions 10 ("Do you think your parent's are proud of you?") and 11 ("Do you have any secrets about your dad you've kept from your mom?"). Lauren felt her parents were not proud of her (although they said they were) and she said she did have secrets about her dad she kept from her mom. When it was revealed that question was answerd correctly, her dad rushed on the stage and kissed Lauren, leaving the mom on the couch looking PISSED! With that last answer, Lauren won $25,000 and needed to answer four more questions to win $100,000. Now I was really sucked into this show!

After that, we were taken to commerical break, but not before a voice said "Coming up next, Lauren must face a question that could ruin her marriage!" I thought it was a typical teaser, but I had no idea what was in store.

After the break, Mark asks Lauren Question 12: "Were you in love with someone else during your wedding?"

Huzzah!

I immediately thought it was a fluff question and that she'd say "no", proving that the teaser was just that. But Lauren took a deep breath and started muttering under her breath. After a few tense seconds, she shocked everyone by answering "Yes."

What?! All Frank could do was smile. I doubt he was happy, but rather the only thing he could do knowing he was on national television getting embarassed and learning that his marriage could be a sham.

Was Lauren telling the truth? You betcha she was! At this point, I started to get sick to my stomach. Seeing Frank's private life get ruined really got to me. Maybe because he kinda looked like me (?), maybe cuz I could relate (although I really don't know why...I'll asked Dr. G about that one on Thursday!), but I felt really bad this was going on.

Oh, and it gets worse.

Mark asks Lauren if she wants to continue and she says she's going for the $100,000 and says to bring it on. Mark then says "I won't be asking the next question...here who is." At that point, out of the laser lights and smoke machine walks Lauren's ex-boyfriend (presumably the guy she was still in love with when she got married.)

Lauren can't believe it and poor Frank looks like he just got hit by a Mack truck.

"Like, oh my God!"

Frank, save yourself!


The Ex (I hate Ex's, I really do.)

The Ex takes a deep breath and asks "Lauren, do you believe I am the man you should be married to?" Oh, snap. I so what to turn the channel but like a car accident, I can't turn away. I'm screaming inside "Damn it Frank, get the fuck out of there!" Lauren's eyes start to water and she's looking at Frank in shock. Again, to my surprise, Lauren answers "Yes" and it turns out, the bitch wasn't lying! Man, it's getting ugly now.

So I have to believe Lauren thinks she's dodged a bullet but before she can regroup, Mark tells her "Okay, well here's the next question...and again, I'm not going to ask it." The audience cheers and Lauren sinks even lower in her chair. Once again, it's the Ex's turn to pop the question:

"If I asked you to leave Frank for me right now, would you do it?

The audience is quite eager to hear her answer but before they can find out, Lauren's sister hits the button to take the question out of the game.

Saved by the bell, err, sister.

Seriously, I didn't think it could get worse for Lauren and Frank. The good news is the Ex leaves and doesn't ask any more questions. The bad news is Lauren still is a whore and has a few more questions she wants to take a chance on to win some more money.

And then came the coup d'état:

"During your marriage with Frank, have you been intimate with anyone else?"

"Umm, yes?"

"That answer is....correct!"

Yeah, I'm not kidding. And as you can imagine, the stills don't even do justice of how awful the events were which were unfolding before my very eyes.

So it's one more question for dear ol' sweet Lauren to answer to win $250,000 and it couldn't have been a better, more ironic question (and result).

"Lauren, do you think you are a good person?"

"Yes!"

"That answer is.....FALSE!"

Ha! So let me get this straight...she admitted to stealing, keeping secrets from her mom, loving another man, committing adultery AND she left with $0? Oh, she is good...good television!

I don't think I'll be watching The Moment of Truth any time soon again, but for the sake of blogging material, I'm glad I caught it. I'm just worried I won't be able to sleep tonight because I'll be wondering which bridge Frank jumped off of after the show.

I had the brew, she had the chronic...

Save The Date!

According to eHarmony's "Marriage Calculator", the most likely date for my marriage (how the hell they come to this, I have no idea...at least they are using my money for something) is May 1, 2016. Go ahead...stop reading, pull out your BlackBerry or Franklin Covey and pencil that date in. No, seriously! I mean, this thing has to be beyond accurate, right?

Don't believe it? Check it out!


And hey, look at that! A 66% chance I'll end up married by the time I'm 65...not too shabby! Of course it's the same percentage of Americans who don't wash their hands or don't know the words to the National Anthem. So now that I think about it, it's really kinda sad.

Damn you Marriage Clock!

Got That Itch Again

Hey, get your mind out of the gutter! I'm disease-free! It's a different kind of itch.

The writing itch!

I honestly don't know why I got it back -- maybe it's all this self-discovery I've been doing and all the emotions I'm unbottling and trying to figure out -- but I feel like writing. Hell, I just don't feel like it...I did it! I got an idea for a short story/stageplay last night and stayed up til 2 AM to bang out a (shitty but therapeutic) lil' 11-page two-character, one-scene short about two friends and eHarmony. Art imitating life? Of course!

Anywho, I pulled out my "writing box" from the bottom of my closet and revisited some old story ideas, skimmed through a couple good scripts submitted to me by two friends who are great writers in their own right and I even looked at some of my own unfinished (or barely started) pieces of literature. Some of the ideas I still think have some legs under them and I could piece together a good story, some of the plots are rather weak and/or passé and I scrapped them and I even put pen to paper (well, more like finger to keyboard) and jotted down a couple new ideas:

Old ideas I'm still interested in
Fictional baseball movie set in a 1960s prison. Think "Major League" meets "Cool Hand Luke". Still passionate about this idea, even after recent similar productions, namely this book and this documentary.

Stage play based on events surrounding Spur Posse incident. I can almost picture my favorite playwright, Neil LaBute, doing something exactly like this. With a subject like the Spur Posse, this could be a powerful and dark work that people would definitely talk about.

Thriller about a young voyeur who witnesses an affair and a violent crime and gets caught up in the incident. Think "Following" meets "Rear Window". It's a thriller plot line that has been done before, but I think it' s something that can still be done again (and well.) I'm thinking of tweaking it to be about a college student who stalks his ex-girlfriend's boyfriend and finds out about his infidelity and dark side and thus, chaos ensues.

Old ideas I no longer am interested in
Political thriller about a Secret Service agent who takes a bullet for the President only to find out the U.S. government was the assassin. Think "In The Line of Fire" meets "JFK". I think it's a somewhat original idea and could be done really well, but I don't know if I have the chops to pull it off.

Thriller based on the Stanford Prison Experiment. I learned about the Stanford Prison Experiment during my freshman year of college and fell in love with the story and the potential of a movie about it. Unfortunately four years later, "Das Experiment" was released.

New ideas to write about
Thriller/drama about a man who's wife dies in a car crash and the man is able to go back in time to save her...however she's not the woman he used to know. Think "What Dreams May Come" meets "The Butterfly Effect". Sounds interesting, right?

RomCom about a young man who meets a girl on vacation but she loses his phone number and his life turns into a quest to find her. They both spend the next ten years leading ordinary lives, only to find out they live across the street from each other. Think "Before Sunrise" meets "Serendipity". Hey, my lone effort into the romantic comedy genre. Two of my favorite plots -- coming-of-age and the idea of soulmates -- converge into one story.


So whatta think? Lemme know what story lines intrigue you and would be worth reading and please tell me which ones don't sound so promising or fresh!

29 Dimensions of Compatibility, My Ass!

DO NOT TRUST THIS MAN!

He's Neil Clark Warren. Actually, he's a schister...a snake-oil salesman...a con man...a fraud...need I go on?

If you can't tell already, I've decided to sign up with eHarmony for the innocent one-month membership. What could go wrong in 30 days, right?

Five days in and I might have just put an ad in the Union-Tribune asking for rodeo clowns, because the people Dr. Neil Clark Warren and his crack-pot team over at eHarmony thought were apparently amazing matches for me have instead caused me to go into greater depression and start to double-lock my doors at night.

Take the profile of Brianne from Costa Mesa for example (and no, the names have not been changed to protect the innocent...):

"I'll listen to anything once, and enjoy almost all forms of music (especially country and musicals!), except most rock and rap."

Um, I can't fucking stand country and my iTunes collection is 80% rock and rap. Wow, they've really hit it on the head on this one! But hey, it's only music...big deal! It's not like this girl admires Rosie O'Donnell or anything...

"I also find Rosie O'Donnell very influential, but not in terms of her politics or her personal sexual preferences, but in terms of her strength."

Dear God, kill me now.

"I used to get scared watching Matlock."

Seriously? I paid how much for this shit?

And to be honest (but not shallow because physical attraction should play a HUGE role in chemistry), this girl was fugly. I know I'm no Marcus Schenkenberg myself, but really, when you can't even bring yourself to scroll past her profile photo, it's tough to take everything else in consideration.

Of course, when I do get a looker like Nicole, I find out she's "unemployed and not really interested in working right now", "loves to party", when people meet her for the first time they find out she's "a super flirt" and she apparently can't live without "tequila, my vibrator and Daddy's credit card". Interesting, yes. Stable relationship, no. And, Michelle, yeah, you're fucking hot but bringing up your ex-boyfriend four times in a 10-question "About Me" doesn't really do it for me.

Don't even get me started Nadya, the Buddhist from Los Osos, California. Her profile is so absurd, I have to reprint it in it's entirety:

The one thing Nadya is most passionate about:

• This morning I am most passionate about ginger tea, a delicious down comforter, and going to the beach.

The three things which Nadya is most thankful for:

• I am thankful for sudden sunshine, measured breath, unfamiliar birdcalls after dawn.
  
• I am thankful for love in all manifestations, for creation, compassion, bliss.
  
• I am thankful for being of service, for startling realization, for when I'm wrong, for ruby red grapefruit.

The most important thing Nadya is looking for in a person is:

• Can they explain to me how a conversation is like sex?

The one thing Nadya wishes MORE people would notice about her is:

• My underwear matches my nail polish.

Nadya typically spends her leisure time:

• In my leisure time I enjoy tasting every arch and dip of your body. I also enjoy laughing until I cry, the spaces between your thoughts, being alone, communicating, and walking barefoot along the edges of the surf.

The things Nadya can't live without are:

• laughing at myself with exquisite abandon
• tea
• pen, paper, books
• thinking and not thinking
• water

The last book Nadya read and enjoyed:

• Calvin and Hobbes.
  

Christ Almighty.

And if I get another "match" for an over-30-year-old woman who loves her five cats and can't live without her CourtTV, I'm going to hang myself from my curtain rack.

Less than a week and I've gotten a dozen awful suggestions for love. If anyone else tried eHarmony and got shafted, I may be starting a class-action lawsuit if you want a piece...

But hey, who knows...maybe Bri, the 25-year-old, 5'3" massage therapist is the one?

Things I Love 2

Last year around this time I posted a list of "Things I Love" (you know, to tie-in with Valentines) and I recently re-read the post and decided to add some more stupid little stuff that, for me, makes life better. Enjoy!

Vanity plates
I like personalized license plates, no matter how lame they may be. I LOVE trying to figure out cryptic ones more than anything. I always wanted to get "YNG GOP" but that time has passed...maybe "OLD GOP" when I hit 60? Or when I get my Bentley, I'll roll with a "JLEDERER" plate.

Movie credits
I love sitting in a theater after the movie ends and just watching the credits. I learned this from my parents. I don't think they did it out of respect for cinema or anything else...I think they just wanted to wait until the aisles cleared to leave. But I do it because it’s peaceful. I can reflect. It's great after a tear-jerker and collecting myself or after a wild ride and trying to comprehend everything I just experienced. The bonus is sometimes at the end, there's something extra to be seen (ie 'Ferris Bueller's Day Off', 'X-Men: Last Stand', 'Naked Gun', etc." Conversely, I hate when at the moment the movie ends, someone on the next row shouts out to their friend, “I can't believe he was the murderer!!”. Or "GOD, SO OBVIOUS!!!" as someone said five seconds before 'Paycheck' finished and pissed the shit out of me.

Over-friendly waitresses
I love it when waitresses (especially the older ones at greasy spoon diners) call me "Sugar" o r "Honey" or any other name like that.

Chinese food serving sizes
I love the way fast-food Chinese restaurants — the good ones — will just PILE on the food. The Panda Express near my apartment, you order a two-item combo and you end up walking out with a six-pound plate of Orange Chicken and chow mein.

Flippin' the script
I love when people you expect to believe one thing believe exactly the opposite. The ideology doesn’t matter as much to me as the ability to go against type. I like very liberal Democrats who are card-carrying members of the NRA. I like uber-conservative Republicans who march against the war. I may disagree with them, but I totally respect the individuality. Hell, I can even respect Red Sox fans who like Derek Jeter (I hate him but damn it, do I respect him) or Larry Bird fans who concede Magic was better or huge Beatles fans who will admit that The Rolling Stones had a few equally great songs. I just like it when people can mix it up a little bit.

Got an Inkling of a Feeling...

I think I want to get another tattoo soon.

I'm not really one for artwork or murals, I like the more subtle words or phrases, kinda like my current ink:

The quotes that I really like/describe me/are a part of my philosophy of life and would be worth putting on my body are as follows:

"That which does not kill us makes us stronger" -Friedrich Nietzsche

"Cogito ergo sum" (I think, therefore I am) -Rene Descartes (I like the look of this example, just not on my neck!)

"2+2=5" -from George Orwell's '1984'

Like I said before, artwork really isn't my style, but atop my list would be the girl and angel off the Smashing Pumpkin's "Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness" album cover. There are several reasons why, of course. Not only are the Pumpkins my second favorite music group, but I think the colors are great, it's beautiful (actually the combination of one famous painting and one not so famous), and most importantly it truly evokes a lot of emotion every time I see it and it's got a sort of celestial and angelic feel to it, which really seems apropos right now in my life:

I'm comin' up!

Workouts have hit an entirely new level, but I'm not worried about burnout cuz (1) the results are suh-weet and (2) it's fun! It's 2O+ miles on the bike before work and 20+ again in the evening. (I'm really digging the Hills Plus setting.) On my lunch break I'm going home and putting in 30 solid minutes of my P90 DVD and tonight, I started my Tuesday Tai Chi class at the Y. (Wow...between that class, my love of philosophy, my kind-heartedness, my new-found interest in becoming spiritual and my celibacy - yeah, I said it - I think my calling may be as a Buddhist monk!)

The only "downfall" of this regimen is I'm taking 3 showers a day, so I can only imagine what my next SDG&E bill will be...

To my three best friends, one of which has notoriously bad ankles and a surgically repaired ACL, another that is going under the knife soon which will prohibit him from hitting the weight room for a while and another who has diabetes and a horrible case of "frozen shoulder": I've already passed one of you up (down?) in weight (although muscle mass and strength is a whole 'nother matter), and I'm gunning for the other two of you.

I've thrown down the gauntlet and you've been put on notice!

:)

Site Tracking

I love checking my ShinyStat site tracker reports everyday...it shows how many visits I'm getting, projections for the week/month/year, what websites are linking to me, what countries I'm getting visits from, and my favorite report: which keywords people use to find my blog.

Just in February, people stumbled upon The Year of Joe by the following interesting, funny, and down-right odd website searches (click on phrase to see why my blog was attached to those keywords):

"lay off me, I'm starving"

Actually, The Year of Joe has been found three times because of this famous Chris Farley bit! In addition, a search of "lay off man im starving" brought someone to here as well. What's really weird is the original post linked to above talked about interesting ShinyStat findings just like today's post! Cue Twilight Zone music...

"adam g. partridge facebook"

Adam, you either are quite vain and searched yourself AND didn't tell us you had a Facebook page or someone is trying to hunt you down.

"you got served raindance"

I'm glad someone else thought that scene was ridiculous (or so I hope.) Oh, and I could look at that Sarah Silverman photo all day long. Sigh...

"bill belichick sweatshirt"

The Google search of "bill belichick sweatshirt" has to be up there with classics like "paris hilton sextape", "dick in a box" and of course, "adam g. partridge facebook".

"jelly of the month club"

Hallelujah. Holy shit. Where's the Tylenol?

"q.lazzarus +goodbye horses"

I can only imagine what that person thought when they came across my post.

"shit valentines"

Yippee, my favorite holiday is right around the corner! Seriously, I'd like to reprint what I originally posted:

Don't get me wrong. Would I have had someone to spend it with, I'd love the day. With my willingness to go all out and my spontaneous romantic creativity (yes, I have it, just no one to use it on), I would rock the shit out of Valentine's Day.

And ladies, you know this!

I'm def gonna have sushi again though, that's for damn sure.

"rolling stones dvd bootlegs blogspot"

Odd, but I recently put up that post so maybe that's why it got picked up.

"evangeline lilly woman of style"

Yes, yes she is. By the way, how freakin' awesome was the Lost season premiere last week? By the way #2, in the post linked above, I did a "favorite things" list. I was actually planning on doing another list this week. Cue Twilight Zone music...again.

"i will never forgive you for making us move to oakland"
This was a head-scratcher for sure. But I did the search myself and discovered I had posted that joke back in this blog's infancy. Must be a pretty popular joke for someone to Google search the punchline.

Big Game Blogging

For fear I'd get sued by the NFL for using "Super Bowl" in my title, here's a couple quick random thoughts and links to check out while the Patriots and Captain America enjoy their 4th championship since 2001.

* * * * *

Whoever invented rain sucks!

I'll be stuck here at work during the game. Not that I had any big party to go to or was planning on drinking and pigging-out (grilled chicken and a protein shake for me, thanks!) but I can't even enjoy the game and commericals from the privacy of my own 20' x 20' studio...instead I'll be in wool trousers, a button-down shirt, Cole Haans and answering phones. Yay for me!

* * * * *

For all of you in a squares pool, check your squares and take a look at Doug Drinen's latest blog post at Pro-Football-Reference.com for your odds of winning.

* * * * *

This is my workout cap...


It was brand new (and white) in December...If you think the cap has seen a lot of change since joining the gym, you should see ME!

* * * * *

Predictions for today:

Pats 31, G-Men 20
Tom Brady named MVP

(Not really going out on a limb, I know.)

* * * * *

Thanks again to everyone for the kinds words, calls, texts and emails of support these last few days. It all meant so much and I can't believe how lucky I am to have great friends.

Ideas vs. People

My friends are suddenly getting political on their blogs (well, not really sudden in Adam's case) and with Super Tuesday right around the corner, who can blame them? Hell, even the notorious fence-sitter and anti-political (publicly, that is) Kory threw his hat into the ring. No matter which way your chad hangs, you should check out John's recent post on why he choose Obama and other political ponderings. I don't agree with him on several fronts, but it's good writing nonetheless. So good, it's inspired me to wax politico a bit here.

With the failure of the legit conservative campaigns (i.e. Duncan Hunter and Fred Thompson) and the less-than-inspiring support Mitt Romney has achieved thus far, there has been some understandable wailing by conservatives about the state of the GOP. Among the remaining Republican candidates, there is one genuine conservative on some core issues but basically abandons others (Huckabee), a moderate-in-conservative's-clothing who is generally if not as dramatically out of step on a large number of issues (McCain), and one candidate (Romney) whose current positions are conservative friendly but have shifted from his early voting record so much that some people really don't know for certain how trustworthy he might be if he actually won the general election. Oh, and there's Ron Paul too. Trust me on this one, conservatives are definitely asking "Has our party abandoned us?"

Well, color me badd crazy, but I believe it has not. I know all of you carry your mini-Constitution with you at all times so please re-read Article II, Section 1: "The executive Power shall be vested in a President of the United States of America." President...that's singular, you know, an individual. Hell, it's a human for cryin' out loud, not a robot. One human being, that's who gets elected and holds the job of President. Not some perfect vessel and that's a fact that must be repeated again and again until people understand that winning and losing elections and choosing leaders is about picking the right person from the available choices. Ideas don't run for president, people do. While my party's remaining options certainly reflect our view of the ideas each man supports, I think it's a grave mistake to read the choice of one man over another as the final and definitive statement of what ideas we truly support. I, for one, as a Republican would like to know that the candidate we end up with has more people behind him than just the ones who agree with every one of his ideas.

If anybody should be upset, it's the "progressive" liberal movement (which, after Kerry in 2004, was needed to keep the Party somewhat relevant) because they have a candidate who is aligned with the base and is genuinely charismatic and well-funded and apparently viable in the general election, and the nomination is drifting away from him. But even there: Obama isn't "progressive" ideas. He's a junior Senator from extremely liberal state of Illinois with the most liberal voting record on the Senate floor and with a very limited resume. And his opponent has her own personal advantages, from name recognition to money to her gender to her husband, who personally occupies a unique position in his party (and will be quite a fascinating case-study ten years from now no matter what happens in this election.) If Obama loses, the "progressives" have a cause to be upset, but it's not Obama's fault, it's the progressive agenda.

I think that the same can be said for McCain. I mean is it just me or is McCain many voters' second rather than first choice and as the field narrows, he's cherry-picking votes? Sure, Fred Thompson, Sam Brownback and Duncan Hunter all had their flaws as campaigners and as potential presidents. It so happens that each of them - the total package all wrapped together - failed to catch on with the voters. What does that mean? Personally, I don't think it means a full-scale, across-the-board movement conservative could not win the nomination and the general election. But it does mean something we ought to know by now: that a full-scale, across-the-board movement conservative can't win the nomination and the general election every four years. My fellow conservatives were fortunate, once upon a time, to have a man named Ronald Reagan lead us. We are not so fortunate every four years. We have been presented with quite a collection of men, each with his own particular virtues as a candidate. We should not take to heart the inevitable process by which one of them is chosen.

Maybe 2008 is the right moment for a moderate Republican, and maybe it is not. We, both Red and Blue Staters alike, can whine and moan about the way the world works, or we can do the best we can with the time and the tools that are given to us. Just remember this one thing: Ideas don't run for president, people do.