Three decals I don't understand why people put on their cars:

1. "In loving memory of . . . "
If I ever go out early, please oh please don't memoralize me with a decal on the back of your 1994 Pontiac Firebird with the lifespan of my years on this earth. I never understood this phenomenon.

2. "BUCK FUSH"
We all know what it's supposed to say. If you're so edgy to bash the President, then at least have the balls to put exactly what you mean. Bucking fitch.

3. The stick figure families
You've seen these. Blue stick figures representing the males in the family (and the only difference between the father and the son is that the father stick figure is bigger) and pink ones (that look just like the blue ones except for the curly hair and dress) for Mother and Daughter. I'm not sure why you want to let strangers on the road how many little daughters live at your house or if you're a single mom with four kids. What's even worse is when they have the stick figure dog.

My "I Haven't Seen Any Of These Movies" Oscar Predictions

I used to be a movie fiend. A buff, if you will. I used to go every week to watch the blockbusters and the tiny indy flicks. But over the last 18 months or so, I find myself rarely going to the theaters. That said, I really feel left out looking at the Academy Award nominees this year. I've seen about three of the movies. Then again, I've heard the movies this year weren't all that impressive.

So without further notice, here are my uneducated Oscar picks:

Best Picture: "The Departed"
I'm only picking it because a) it's the only one I've seen and b) I really, really liked it. I think "Little Miss Sunshine" will pull off the upset (would that be an upset?) though. I see "Letters from Iwo Jima" is nominated. I know Clint Eastwood directed it and was WWII epic like his "Flags of our Fathers" but told from the Japanese viewpoint. When "Flags" came out, everyone was touting it as Best Pic worthy. Was "Letters" that much better and what happened to all the buzz that was surrounding "Flags"?

Best Director: Martin Scorsese
Martin is the man and "The Departed" was everything I love in a movie. If he doesn't win, Eastwood ("Letters") is always deserving. I also would love to see Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu ("Babel") win. His "21 Grams" is one of my favorite movies ever and "Amores Perros" was very, very good as well. What a talent!

Best Actor: Forest Whitaker
I guess he's supposed to run away with it. I've always liked Forest and his crazy lazy eye. Wouldn't mind seeing Will Smith or Leo win it too.

Best Actress: Helen Mirren
She took home the hardware (twice) in the Golden Globes and everyone says she did a great job. Is it just me or does Judi Dench and Meryl Streep get nominated every year?

Best Original Screenplay: "Little Miss Sunshine"
Haven't seen it. I should have. The trailers made it look like a movie right up my alley. I hope the writer is rewarded.

Who do you like?

Light bloggin'

If I could go one day without reading, hearing or seeing any news about Britney Spears, Paris Hilton or Anna Nicole Smith, I'd be amazing. Shocked even.

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On the other hand, I could look at photos of Jessica Alba all day long. (Thanks Scott for the tip.)

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Going to Karaoke on Thursday night . . . I'm taking requests.

Day off dilemna

Tomorrow is my day off. I really don't have much planned. I don't feel like playing golf (spending 60+ hours at a golf course in a week will do that do you.) I can't really go out late, given that I'll be at work the next day. I got new tires on my bike and have only rode on it twice since I got them replaced a couple weeks ago. I'll definitely be pedaling tomorrow. Up to Huntington Beach, I think. I'll also run a few errands and do a few chores.

Other than that, I have no idea. I used to always watch all the nominated films every year but recently I haven't been all that inspired. Manana I just might catch a flick, 'Babel' being the leadig contender now. Maybe later I'll do some number crunching for the upcoming fantasy baseball drafts I'm in.

Now for your help: If I have a day off next week, what should I do? Any recommendations or ideas?

Blogging Las Vegas

Didn't have much on the ol' mind today, so after work I flipped on the NBA All-Star Game. It was halfway over but I figured "Hell, why not blog the second half?"

• 6:54 PM And performing at halftime is . . . Toni Braxton? Really?
• 7:01 PM Mmmm, Christina Aguilera. Let the record retroactively show that I was ALWAYS a Christina-guy, even back when she was getting labeled as trashy and Brittney was the queen of pop. I think it's safe to say now Brittney is about an 11 on the trash scale while Christina is clearly the more talented, as well as being more and more often praised for her look and style, which most often is called "glamorous."
• 7:06 PM Wow, I've been watching for 15 minutes now and already five jokes about Charles Barkley's gambling habits.
• 7:09 PM They just aired a new Nike Air Jordan commercial. It shows the tragic final seconds of a high school hoops game with Mozart's Requiem playing . . . I don't care what any one says; that's one great commercial. Fantastic. And coming from a great brand (see this commercial as another recent example), one should expect nothing less.
• 7:14 PM The "Jeep Game Summary" catches me up on the stats up to the half . . . nice to know the East is leading in dunks, 15-9.
• 7:16 PM I really like the jerseys. It's a few years in a row now that I think the NBA has nailed them.
• 7:18 PM Amare Stoudemire and Tracy McGrady are both wearing #1 for the West. If I was Eddie Jordan, I'd file a protest with the League office. And yes, I'm calling it the League office. I hate that people call the NBA "the Association."
  
• 7:21 PM There was just about fifteen turnovers committed in the last two minutes. I know it's the All-Star Game, but it's really a microcosm of why I don't watch NBA basketball: no defense and sloppy play.
• 7:24 PM They are playing music during the game over the loud speakers. Is it because it's just an exhibition or is that normal for an NBA game?
• 7:27 PM Dirk "Don't call me Barry Pepper" Nowitzki is shown on the bench. They flash he's a 9-year veteran. God damn, I feel old.
• 7:30 PM Sprite really needs to stop with those sublymonal commercials. They scare me.
• 7:31 PM The Super Bowl favorite Bud Light "paper, rock, scissors" commercial just aired. I just noticed that the guy must have been carrying that rock the whole time. Who carries a rock around during a BBQ? Those are not people I want drinking my Bud Lights.
• 7:32 PM Only about sixty mentions of Jeep so far, whether it's a commercial, promo or "sponsored by . . ." At this point I'm expecting Doug Collins to interview the game's MVP inside a Jeep at halfcourt.
• 7:35 PM I'm willing to bet that Tony Prker keeps his socks on when he makes love. Freakin' Frenchie.
• 7:38 PM Caron Butler is an All-Star? How's the Kwame Brown trade doing now, Laker fans?
• 7:40 PM 3rd quarter comes to a close (119-88, people) and even though it's the NBA's showcase for all their stars, I'm still not remotely interested in watching a second more. Now I know why I didn't want to watch this in the first place.

Can baseball start any sooner?

Hot damn!

It was about 80 degrees today. Sunny and dry. Would have been perfect if not for the wind.

Did I forget to mention it's February? God bless global warming!

And speaking of such a topic, I think this is friggin' hilarious. If you missed it, this is from last week:

HOUSE HEARING ON 'WARMING OF THE PLANET' CANCELED AFTER ICE STORM
Tue Feb 13 2007 19:31:25 ET

The Subcommittee on Energy and Air Quality hearing scheduled for Wednesday, February 14, 2007, at 10:00 a.m. in room 2123 Rayburn House Office Building has been postponed due to inclement weather. The hearing is entitled “Climate Change: Are Greenhouse Gas Emissions from Human Activities Contributing to a Warming of the Planet?”

On the same day, Maryville University in St. Louis cancelled a screening of Al Gore's "An Inconvenient Truth" due to a snow storm. Oh how I love irony!

Best Pic

Watched 'The Departed' tonight.

Wow.

On top of that, I watched the two last episodes of 'Lost' last night.

Double wow.

You can't spell "Valentine's Day" without V.D.

WARNING: This post is extremely negative. Perhaps even depressing. It's basically me feeling sorry for myself and wallowing in my sorrow. You have been warned. Proceed with caution.

What a miserable piece of shit holiday.

Don't get me wrong. Would I have had someone to spend it with, I'd love the day. With my willingness to go all out and my spontaneous romantic creativity (yes, I have it, just no one to use it on), I would rock the shit out of Valentine's Day.

And ladies, you know this!

But alas, I have no significant other. Hell, I don't even have an insignificant other. So, in a word, this day flat out sucks.

When I got off work, I was feeling rather melancholy so I thought I'd treat myself to some sushi and sake. (Spicy tuna rolls and salmon with cream cheese rolls, if you must know.) For the twenty minutes or so I partook in this delicious meal, I was feeling fairly content. That I realized I was alone eating sushi and drinking an entire bottle of sake. I never drink alone. Hell, I hardly drink period. But to finish off an entire bottle of ice-cold sake by myself is just plain dispiriting.

Know what else is depressing? My life just became a once-funny-now-oddly-bleak movie quote. Remember in "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind" when the character Frank says "The only Valentine's Day cards I get are from my mother. How pathetic is that?"?

Well, the only thing I got for Valentine's was a card and candied apple from my mom. It's really sweet and I love her for it. But it sucks because it's the only thing I got.

If that wasn't bad enough, I think I nailed the trifecta today of women kicking me in the proverbial balls:

1. A total stranger at work asked me what I'm doing for Valentine's Day tonight. I told her nothing. She wondered why and I told her I didn't have a Valentine. So she tells me that I am handsome and very kind, which gives me a big smile. Then she seriously asks me "So what's wrong with you?" Nice lady. Really friggin' nice.

2. An ex-girlfriend brought up an amazing Valentine's we had together back in the day. As if that's supposed to help?

3. Someone gave me the classic, eternally dejecting line of "We should just be friends." I wonder why Hallmark hasn't come out with a card that reads that. Seems like it'd be a huge seller. Regardless of your intentions, it's a line you never want to hear. I basically means "There's at least one thing glaringly wrong with you or else I'd like a deeper relationship." Now there has Shoebox Greetings written all over it!

Now given incidents 1 and 3, I'm now wondering . . . What exactly is wrong with me?

I honestly hope all of you who did spend Valentine's Day with a loved one had a great time. (By the way, all of you who responded to my mass text message, thanks. You lifted my spirits. And I love you all for it.)

Things I Love

As promised, here's a list of just a few things that I love, an idea inspired by my bud John.

Breakfast at night
I love a hearty, four-course meal as much as the next guy, but there's something so comforting and simple about a big bowl of cereal late at night or scrambled eggs and toast after a long day of work. I'm even a bigger fan of having breakfast after hours at hole-in-the-wall diners.

Driving for no reason
Although it's not very conducive in this age of costly petrol, I absolutely love just driving. No set destination. No plans where I'll turn next. I'm very solitary by nature, so I really enjoy being by myself and just taking in the road in front of me. Usually it's a drive up the coast in the afternoon and soaking up the view of the ocean, but my favorite is driving at night, windows down and heater on, with some great music and just heading south.

Baseball
It's the greatest game. I love to watch it. I love to play it. I love to read about it. I love to try and dissect it and its stats. Not only is the game wonderful, but so are some of the residuals. The sound of the crack of bat against ball. The smell of peanuts and hot dogs. The eternal debating in bars and living rooms. Give me baseball or give me death, I say.

The area on a woman between the neck and shoulder
There are a lot of parts of the female that attract me: eyes, smile and legs are three that I constantly find myself checking out. But there's just something about that tiny area just at the bottom of the neck, just below the shoulder. I don't know what it is about it. But damn it, I love it. I doubly love it if I catch you caressing or rubbing it. Sweet Jesus. I think the Devil said it best (Pacino in 'Devil's Advocate'):

"A woman's shoulders are the frontlines of her mystique. And her neck, if she's alive, has the very mystery of a border town."

In case you can't picture the spot I'm waxing poetic about, here's my girl Evangeline Lilly to show us all just what I mean:

Sushi
I've only been eating sushi for about four years now, but it's easily leapfrogged the likes of pizza, steak, club sandwich and calamari for the title of "Favorite food". If not for the price, I could eat sushi every day. If I ever strike it rich, there will be a sushi chef on staff at my palatial estate at all times.

Holding hands
Not that I've done much of this lately, but from what I remember -- sigh . . . -- I love it. While it's perhaps the most simple form of physical affection, it really works, at least for me. Do it walking, do it while cuddled on the couch, it's all the same. It's constant holding, it's a sense of security, it's love broken down to it's essence. If you love someone, hold their hand tomorrow.

The piano
I wish I could play the darn thing. I think the piano produces the most beautiful music. The piano can bridge any musical style to my liking. And it doesn't even have to be very complex playing. Just the soft pounding of the keys can get me all happy. For example, the piano in Coldplay's "Trouble" just rocks me.

A cool pillow
You know what I'm talking about. The moment you lay your face on it, a calmness just rushes over you. If this company ever goes public, I'll be first in line to invest.

So that happened . . .

Wow.

It's a blur and barely a blur at that.

If you haven't noticed, this blog has gone dormant during the past week. I knew last week would be busy at work, but I had no idea what was truly in store for me.

Monday: 8 AM - 8 PM
Tuesday: 7 AM - 8 PM
Wednesday: 5 AM - 8 PM
Thursday: 5 AM - 8 PM
Friday: 5 AM - 8 PM
Saturday: 5 AM - 6 PM

Not only were the hours brutal, but I was more stressed than I've ever been. Headaches, stomach cramps, breaking out, sore legs . . . I thought by Friday that I was going to cry myself to sleep.

But as they say, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, right? Hell, yesterday on Monday I worked 11 hours and it felt like a half day!

I rewarded myself by heading up to Pebble Beach in the middle of the night on Saturday to follow a friend's final round of the PGA Tour event (he finished 3rd!) We drove 6 hours straight to get there at 7 AM. We spent the day at Pebble, then left at 4 PM to get home at 10:30 PM. What a trip! While I didn't catch up on my sleep that I've been sorely lacking (I did that last night . . . I feel refreshed as ever now), it was great to get some fresh air and spend the entire day out of the office.

This week will still be busy but not so busy where I won't be blogging again. It's my day off today and my brotha-from-anotha-mutha John had a great blog post the other day about some of his favorite things. I think I'm going to partake in a few of my favorite things today, then I think I'll do a similar list.

Later!

I don't know if we'll have enough time.

Okay, I'll do one . . .

13 hour day, so I can't make this a regular post. Tomorrow will be even longer and busier at work (something like 5:30 AM to 8:00 PM) so I can't promise much tomorrow as well.

Plus 'Lost' is back on too!

So let's generate some discussion which a caption contest!

Time keeps on slippin'

This might sound lame to you, but I reached another monumental moment in my weight loss: my watch has gotten too lose to wear on my wrist at the current notch. When I bought the watch in August, I had to wear it on the second notch. I'm now down to the four notch.

Good news is that this means I'm losing weight and it's the weight that doesn't disappear when you step on the scale. Bad news was at one time, I had somewhat fatty wrists. Yuck!

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This blog has been increasing in visits (and comments) by the day. For all you who are reading and kind enough to contribute in the comment section, thank you. Your support and participation makes it easier to write something new every day.

The coolest thing about running a blog/website is the tracking you can do. A few weeks ago someone found this blog by Googling "How tall is comedian Lewis Black?" Random, I know.

In the last two weeks, I've gotten some interesting repeat visitors. One from Cal State San Bernadino, one from UC San Francisco and most interestingly, one from Argentina. If any of you three read this, lemme know who you are and how you found this magnificent blog!

Greetings!

UPDATE: After posting tonight, I checked my tracker and within the last 30 minutes, I had a visit from Canada and China.

People know me from coast to coast like butter and toast!

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Lyrics of the Week:

Who am I, what and why?
'Cuz all I have left is my memories of yesterday
Ooh, these sour times

'Cuz nobody loves me
It's true
Not like you do

-Portishead, "Sour Times"

Where I went super wrong . . .

1. Quarterbacks Peyton Manning (19-42, 273 yards, 2 TD, 2 INT) and Rex Grossman (16-38, 302 yards, 2 TD, 1 INT, 1 fumble) will have similar stats but it'll be Grossman's two turnovers that make him the goat. Manning's mistakes will come in the first half whereas Grossman will have a poor second half.

Well, I was off on both of their numbers, but I was right about Manning getting better as the game wore on. If you told me before the game that Grossman would have thrown for 165 yards and 2 INTs, I would have put all the money in the world on the Colts.

2. There won't be a single 100 yard rusher, but the two-headed tandems for each team (Addai and Rhodes: 162 yards, Thomas and Benson: 155 yards) will combine for over 150 yards apiece.

I was wrong that there wouldn't be a 100 yard rusher. However, Addai and Rhodes did have big days combining for 190 yards. I think if Benson wasn't hurt in the first quarter, the Bears would have rushed for over 150 total yards.

3. The biggest offensive stars will be each team's respective top wideout (Harrison: 141 yards, 1 TD and Muhammed: 110 yards, 2 TD).

Both receivers had mediocre games. It was Wayne and Berrian who were the go-to guys for Indy and Chicago.

4. The Colts will score on their opening drive but Chicago will hold them to only 10 points in the entire first half.

Wrong again. I don't think I'll be opening any palm reading shops any time soon.

5. Grossman's interception will be returned for a TD.

Ah ha! Got that one right!

6. Devin Hester will return a kick for a TD but it will be called back on a Chicago penalty.

I saw holding on his return, didn't you?

7. Adam Vinatieri will be the last player to score in the entire game and his kick will come with 3:00 left in the game.

Hey, he was the last one to score, however it was 3:00 into the 4th quarter.

Overall, the game was sloppy but it was fun to watch and some of the commercials were good too. I'm glad Indianapolis won and now Peyton got the monkey off his back.

Know what this means now?

10 days 'til pitchers and catchers!!

My Fearless, Way Too Detailed Super Bowl Predictions

1. Quarterbacks Peyton Manning (19-42, 273 yards, 2 TD, 2 INT) and Rex Grossman (16-38, 302 yards, 2 TD, 1 INT, 1 fumble) will have similar stats but it'll be Grossman's two turnovers that make him the goat. Manning's mistakes will come in the first half whereas Grossman will have a poor second half.

2. There won't be a single 100 yard rusher, but the two-headed tandems for each team (Addai and Rhodes: 162 yards, Thomas and Benson: 155 yards) will combine for over 150 yards apiece.

3. The biggest offensive stars will be each team's respective top wideout (Harrison: 141 yards, 1 TD and Muhammed: 110 yards, 2 TD).

4. The Colts will score on their opening drive but Chicago will hold them to only 10 points in the entire first half.

5. Grossman's interception will be returned for a TD.

6. Devin Hester will return a kick for a TD but it will be called back on a Chicago penalty.

7. Adam Vinatieri will be the last player to score in the entire game and his kick will come with 3:00 left in the game.



And now my Fearless, Not So Detailed Super Bowl Predictions:

Colts 27, Bears 23. (MVP: Marvin Harrison)

Great White Hype

I was in line at the grocery store and noticed whitening chewing gum. Now I've known about this product but I've never used or nor have I thought much about it. Standing in what was the slowest moving line ever assembled gave me plenty of ample time to think about it.

Who the hell chews gum with their front teeth? I chew gum with my molars but I've never once said to myself "Geez, I wish my molars were whiter." Isn't it the front teeth people get bleached? Therefore you must chew the gum with your front teeth for the whitening to take place, right?

And if it's not the gum-on-teeth contact that causes the whitening, who in God's green earth is keeping that much saliva in their mouth that is allowing the whitening process to take affect?!?!

I demand answers.

Now hair me out . . .

I had a crazy, crazy dream last night. I honestly don't remember the last time I had a dream or nightmare, but last night's was quite vivid.

So I was getting ready for a date (yeah, so you know it's clearly a dream) and I got out of the shower and was trying to get my hair just perfect. For the life of me, I nothing worked and I started freaking out. So I decided to cut my own hair. In doing so, I left brutal, awful patches of missing hair and started freaking out even more. I was so worked up and my 'do looked so bad, I completely bailed on the date.

Then I woke up. I'm pretty sure I had a nervous breakdown in my sleep. Wonder what Freud would say about that.

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The day at the Corporate Office went great. Got to meet a lot of familiar voices . . . it's weird "knowing" people only because you talk to them on the phone a lot. It was nice to finally meet them face to face.

One person I met was the Director of West Operations, probably third or fourth from the top of the chain of command in the entire company. When my GM introduced me, he told him "This guy will be one of your GMs in a year or so."

So I've got that going for me, which is nice.

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Made the schedule for next week. We're rolling out the brand new POS system, so I need to be there to train everyone, make sure they know what they're doing plus stick around to answer any questions and solve any snafus. Total hours for the week?

Seventy-nine.

Whoo ahh!