1.29.2008

Duel of Duality

The difficult thing for me right now is the extreme duality of the situation, on so many levels:

*For the past three months, I honestly have never been in a better place in life, really an all-time high. After yesterday's news, I'm suddenly at the damn-near lowest point of my life.

*Although unable to totally express it, I lately have never had so much love to give. Now, I instantly feel empty.

*As a life-long Atheist, I've dismissed what lies beyond life. Now I find myself wondering what will really happen to my devout Catholic grandmother when she passes.

*In a similar vain, I've been doing a lot of thinking about love, marriage, and finding that one person to spend "forever" (which meant until death) with. All of a sudden, I wonder if death does end that togetherness or if there is a way to literally spend eternity with loved ones.

6 comments:

Pat Diaz said...

Yo man...i can show you some stuff in the Bible if you want. About love and death and the afterlife. Let me know.

Anonymous said...

Atheist……So what do you say when someone sneezes? ……….. You don’t believe in a god or organized religion? To be honest I don’t believe in them either. Both religion and god seem like a controlling mechanism and more of a need for people who need structure and emotional support. On the other hand being an atheist does not necessarily mean the absence of all spirituality. When my grandparents passed, I remember facing these thoughts as well, thoughts of wondering about what will happen to them after life. As crazy as it may sound I know they are still here. My family and I have seen them in dreams, talked to them even, especially when times got hard. They are still here. Where exactly? Not too sure, but here in spirit.

Conrad said...

I had a pretty smart-ass remark, but I believe it would come out (typed anyway) harsher than I intend it to. So I will just give you my new favorite default answer for anything I don't like:

I think that Ronald Reagan would find that reprehensible.

j.h.k. said...

I find it amusing how so often atheists or agnostics seem to trivialize those who believe in God as needing some sort of crutch. I would, of course, strongly disagree, and recommend that Anonymous not waste their pity on us, the apparently emotionally handicapped.

Deep thoughts, Joe. Lot of action. I'm glad to hear that you are doing so well and I have no doubt that, despite suddenly being brought down by this situation, you'll get back to where you were before this news broke. In the meantime, you've got good friends, buddy.

Conrad, great fucking line.

Ronald Reagan said...

I find that reprehensible!

Conrad said...

See, I told you so.